The amount of media exposure happening in our lives is insane. Every day a new movie releases, a new TV series begins, next season opening is scheduled and limitless things happening around.
In limelight stands – the love stories. The purpose behind this is pure entertainment.
Around 80% of the population spends their time watching movies or TV series. Binge-watching is the new mood. It is all fun and merry until it is on-screen.
Unknowingly, we shape our beliefs and ideas surrounding them. Unconsciously, the elements from reel life seep into real life.
When the expectations from the on-screen couple transcends into your relationship, that’s when it might be a game-over even before the game began.
The common trope of love
Every love-based story has a basic plot underlying it. Two people meet, develop mutual feelings, overcome the barriers and crisis happening in their life in lightning speed and bam they live happily ever after.
The backdrop may differ but the core remains unchanged. The whole plot is over-simplified and crammed up in limited time to win the audience.
We need to face the bitter truth; our life is never going to be as short as the
movie or a TV series.
Love transcends every barrier
There is a warped sense of illusion created that love triumphs over everything or love transcends all.
Love is what makes us humans. No doubts about it. But the kind of love we look for in our life is; it is an exponential graph which is ever-rising.
Relationships have dips and soars; you are bound to have highs and lows in your relationship for life-time. There isn’t a time-bound rule for your relationship.
Prince charming awaits you with his chariot
Rom-coms are created with females as the target audience.
On-screen you see hero swoops in to save the day. He is the knight in shining armor saving the damsel in distress.
I know we are in 21 st century, where we raise voice for equality. Our life isn’t a fairy tale where we can drop behind a shoe or go kissing frogs.
We are our saviors. No prince charming is waiting with his chariot to ride into the sunset.
Six packs and tight booties
Not every guy has six-packs and not every girl has an hourglass shaped figure.
Watching movies sets an unrealistic standard in our minds. Have realistic bars set when it comes to what you expect from your partner.
The connection runs many levels deep and physical connection is just one step in.
We see a common concept of ‘marrying up’ where the only factor that matters in their partner is how deep their pockets run.
Financial security is essential. But don’t go around with your head in clouds thinking you will fall in love with a rich guy or girl.
Everyone on earth isn’t a billionaire and Mr. Grey is a fictitious character, mind you.
Love at first sight
Movies make it look so dreamy when the hero sets his eyes on the girl and BOOM! he’s in love. The girl just melts for his smirk and then they live happily-ever-after.
‘Love at first sight’ is wrongly named for attraction.
How can you fall in love at just an instant without knowing the person and the layers beneath them?
These are just idealizations and should be taken with a grain of salt.
Marriage portrayed as a dark web
Relationships are rosy until the wedding bells. You are down the rabbit hole of marriage moving forward.
Marriages are portrayed as the dark-web in which you are entangled and there’s no going back. Marriages need work and commitment. It’s a learning curve for you until death does apart.
Not everything about movies or TV series is bad.
You have some take home messages like in ‘500 days of summer’, you see not every time your feelings may be reciprocated or you may fall in love when you least expect it.
‘One day’ shows how our partner is our best friend first and then a lover. Relationship with friendship and love makes a bond that could last forever.
‘Bridget Jones Diary’ tells us we think we want to fall in love with a particular trait of a person. But you aren’t aware what kind of partner you need in life until you are hook, line, sunk in love with them.
Rom-com movies are figments of the imagination of human minds. They imprint views of romance to expect in our relationship, incognizant to our mind. It is good to dream but there is a fine line between dreaming and being down-right delusional.
Hefner after doing research on the same commented on findings from their study that:
“The bottom line is that the interactions and statements found in these films are not idealistic at all. However, the larger themes of the movies are idealistic. It seems that the couples go through realistic challenges and difficult obstacles, but resolve their differences with ideal conclusions.”
There is true love out there for you. If you believe in it, it will find you. Have a clear mind and you will attract the right partner meant for you.